- Posted by: Sanjeev
- 14 Aug, 2019
How to know if he is the right guy for marriage?
Dating is not always the labyrinth leading to marriage. When you are dating, you are exploring your emotions, compatibility and sexuality. Your dating life can be as wild as you want it to be. It is a greatly teachable experience that nobody prepares us for. From our teenage years till our 30s, we are looking for our worth, identity, affection and new experiences. It is a metamorphic age and time when we’re allowed to make mistakes. Our biggest lessons are recollected from these very moments further in life.
After experiencing the good, the bad and the ugly relationships, you are wondering if your present boyfriend is ‘the one.’ But rethink, is it the idea of being married to him is just a new challenge for you or something you both want to work out? Knowing the right steps to take gets tough. You live in a completely new age and your priorities are different than what your mother’s needs once were. You might attract damaged goods at the cost of your self-worth. That is not the way to proceed. Your relationship is doomed to fail if you choose impossible situations to find love.
At DDS Detectives, we offer Pre-Matrimonial Investigation in Delhi and other branches, to those who want to dig in and recheck the partner’s background before they get hitched. Keep scrolling to read 15 signs that will reassure you that your boyfriend is the one for you. If you are looking for a detective agency in Gurgaon, feel free to call us.
Signs he’s the one that you will marry:
1. Chemistry: Before anything else, the chemistry between you and your partner is a prerequisite. The chemistry in your relationship is the many layers of desire, attraction and fuzziness you feel when he’s around you. It is not something that dies after six dates. It is something you make him feel and vice versa. This is not something you can hide. And certainly not something you can pretend to have between each other. This is where the ultimate intimacy kicks in. This is the “butterflies-in-the-stomach” feeling that years of your relationship cling on to. Without it, your potential marriage will be dull.
2. Friendship and a sense of humor: It is still true that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Except that instead of food, it’s now the laughs that shall hurt his stomach that do the magic trick. A sense of humor keeps your relationship alive even when the worst situations greet you. Inside jokes, friendly banter and sharing memes can make almost anything easy. If you both were friends before you dated, isn’t that the best? Sharing the same range of intellect as him, looking out for each other and every day making an effort to make each other laugh. Looking beyond the problems in life and choose to see the lighter and funnier sides of things is something you both do, you’re meant to be together.
3. The way you deal with problems: It works if your boyfriend sees your relationship as a team, as two equal individuals who work great together. You both deal with problems that come your way as problems. And not as inadequacies on each other’s parts. At every stage, you remember that problems are a way of life but the two of you are in it together. Anything can be resolved if we start treating a problem without making it someone else’s problem. Shifting blame is not something either of you are doing. It is you both against the problem; you are not each other’s problems.
4. You want to learn from each other: Inspiring and admiring each other is a beautiful thing to share in a romantic relationship. Being loved by someone you truly admire is rare. Your boyfriend’s work, interests and activities should inspire you. And he must do the same for you. Having respect and wanting to learn things, ideas, theories and facts from him is something that can take your relationship a long way. If he asks you and listens to what you do, and loves or acknowledges your ideas, don’t let him go.
5. Compatibility: Better than learning from him is already sharing the same interests, ideologies, beliefs. If you were in the same class in college or had the same job, you grew up together. Therefore, you both have a similar way of doing things. This helps avoid conflicts and having to explain to each other why you did something the way you did. Compatibility issues are one of the reasons both love and arranged marriages don’t tend to work out. If you are compatible, remember that it is the greatest thing to have in a relationship.
6. No games: If you are reading this, this means that it is a serious relationship for you and you wish to take it to the next level. But is it the same hunch that he has too? Are both of you are on the same page? He loves you and cares for you but is it just a casual relationship for him? Not in a bad way, but it is just his attitude towards relationships? You must know because mixed signals are always a red flag. If he is serious, he has brought it your notice. Take that as a plus.
7. Emotional Availability: Men and women tend to have different emotional experiences. In heterosexual relationships, women often complain about their partner’s emotional unavailability. If your boyfriend cannot listen or comfort you about a bad day at work, take the first exit you see right now. If your boyfriend cannot express his emotions, vent about things that make him sad, it is a sign that he is repressing his emotions. If this is not true for you, you both are good to go.
8. Warning Signs: Do not let it go unnoticed if you see signs of sex addiction, shopping addiction, gambling addiction in him. Count in alcohol or substance abuse at this stage of your life. This is a wake-up call now when your careers are at stake. If he is addicted right now, what will it be like in the years to follow when you marry?
9. Meeting Needs: With the evolution of gender roles, women have become independent. If you are independent in all aspects of life, so should be your partner. One you are married, he should not expect nourishment from you like a mother .You both should be able to do both the jobs and divide your responsibilities. Often, men tend to subconsciously shift their needs to their partner that their mother fulfilled once. We have moved on from such traditional times.
10. Worth, Identity and Opinions: Flashback to teen years when you were forming yourself and your self-concept. Now you are a fully-grown individual who knows her sense of worth, identity and opinions. Your boyfriend cannot overpower or neglect any of it. And you, cannot allow them to. Whether it’s a relationship or a marriage, this should never happen. You both need to know and remember who you are outside of your relationship.
11. An attitude of success: It is often in show-business and real life, that materialistic women marry men for their money and property. But you as an independent woman should never do that. Even when your parents’ concerns are that he should well-to-do. What you should look for is that he imparts an attitude of growth. He is growth-oriented and wants to make his own success in life. Inherited possessions are not a matter of grace when the person you marry has no goals in life.
12. Acceptance: Since you are in a serious relationship with each other, you both must know one another by now. You know his positives and negatives, and vice versa. Your characters should be parallel to each other. In a way, that you complete each other’s shortcomings and not backlash it instead. You both are truthful and accepting towards each other. This is an indicator of a successful relationship and a green signal towards marriage.
13. He thinks of marriage: Hold up, are you sure you are not the only one in the relationship who is reading such articles and imagining a marital future? If you are sure, then you are set. If he is also game to marriage, he loves your family and talks about his future with you in it, this is it.
14. Compromise: A sacred union like marriage requires selflessness, patience and compromise. Before you leap into marriage, be sure that it is something you both are mature enough to do. Compromise is something that happens as you expect growth in life. Your most difficult moments of compromise can lead you to the greatest stages of life. When you share your life somebody new, you must prepare for everything. If he is willing to do that for you as you are for him, you are both fit for marriage.
15. Communication: The trickiest of all, the master-key to a good relationship is communication. Are you and your partner comfortable enough to discuss anything? Awkward topics, criticisms, talking about family and your inhibitions, are they all subjects of your discussions? Do you both talk enough? Communication is the answer to the problems you will face. The solution will naturally be produced if you just speak to each other. In some relationships, communication is so strong that you can explain big issues with the blink of an eye. If not that, even if you both open to each other without pretence or sugar-coating, gear up because you both are a rare pair!
Like we said, dating is not always the labyrinth leading to marriage. But sometimes, it can be. It can become a crystal-clear path to a successful marriage. Do not let each other go because you just lack commitment at the moment. Take your time and get ready to make some mistakes with your favourite person.
